my friend julian

First off, Julian isn't really my friend. He's not even a real person. Okay, well he is, but I don't know him, and his name probably isn't Julian. It's confusing.

Let me tell you what I know about Julian:

Julian does not like snacks.
Julian does not value personal hygiene.
Julian does not have a need for stylish tan flats.
Julian does not have chapped lips.
Julian does not need a keychain bottle opener that says "peace love accordion."
Julian does not like German crosswalk signal keychains.
Julian does not care much for keychains or car keys in general.
Julian does not think that my nine-year-old friend is a good artist.
Julian does not own battery-operated electronics.

Julian does like Chili's.
Julian does like the color blue.
Julian does frequent gas stations.
Julian does think it's okay to steal.
Julian does have possession of my wallet.

Julian stole my wallet on Saturday. He most likely nabbed it out of my purse at Temple Square while I was taking pictures for my best friend's wedding. And the location and the timing make me almost just as mad as the fact that he took it in the first place.

When we first began to take pictures, I put my purse down against the temple (it was literally touching the House of God) and took my place in the first round of pictures. While family pictures were being taken, I noticed that most of the wedding party had congregated in a different place than where my purse was, so I initially was going to move my purse closer to them. But then I saw that my purse had been hidden beneath a mountain of other handbags, backpacks, and diaper bags, so I thought it would be just fine there. Plus, I tend to assume that people visiting the temple grounds are NOT there to steal from just-out-of-college interns, and it didn't even cross my mind that somebody might take my things.

But Julian took it anyway.

And now is the part that necessitates me explaining why I've named this nameless, faceless thief, lest y'all think I'm completely insane.

I was not a happy camper when I realized that my wallet had most definitely been stolen. I'd been operating under the assumption that it had simply fallen out of my purse at some point. (Again, I tend to assume that most people aren't thieves.) But then when I saw charges on my account that I definitely didn't make, I was livid. I couldn't believe that somebody would do something like this and inflict such a negative, stressful ending on such an amazingly happy day that was supposed to be a celebration of love and family and togetherness and eternal marriage.

And in my anger, I was so tempted to hate the person who had done this to me and to wish terrible things upon him or her. But after calming myself a bit, I knew that I needed to take a more Christlike approach to this. I knew that no matter the awful thing this thief did to me, I had to forgive him or her and recognize that he/she was a child of God just like I am.

So I gave the thief a name and a backstory. I called him Julian and decided that life has not been kind to him lately. He's been down on his luck and out of money and very hungry. He probably has a family to provide for. So when he saw the opportunity to buy some food and take care of some living expenses, he took it. And though this is the most optimistic (and probably most unrealistic) version of events I could have come up with, I need to make myself believe that it's true. I need to humanize this thief so that I wasn't filled with hate and bitterness and anger. I need to forgive Julian.

Naturally, I'm still upset about the whole ordeal. I'm upset that he took my money and is causing so much stress. I'm upset that I can't drive legally and that I'm going to have to get a new drivers license. I'm upset that I am having to borrow money from my brother so that I can put gas in the car and pay for my train tickets to get to work. I'm upset that Julian could very easily steal my identity and get credit cards in my name. (I forgot to take my Social Security card out of my wallet after providing it as ID for my new job; normally I'm not dumb enough to carry it around with me like that.) I'm upset that my temple recommend is gone. I'm upset that my collection of ticket stubs is gone. (I'm sentimental, okay?) I'm upset that I have to buy a new wallet, because I really liked that one, and it was fairly new.

It's just an upsetting situation. But humanizing Julian and trying to give him the benefit of the doubt is helping me to focus on the things I can do to fix it. I cancelled my debit card, and a new one is on the way. I made a list of the organizations I need to call to iron out my drivers license-less-ness and missing Social Security card and other minor debacles Julian caused. I talked to my parents to make sure I wasn't leaving anything out.

And I keep praying that I will be able to forgive Julian and put this behind me. I imagine it will take some time for me to truly forgive him, but I'll keep praying for that blessing.

And then I'll pray some more.