is that burning smell coming from your apartment?

The quick answer is yes. Yes, the burning smell is coming from our apartment. No, that is not a common occurrence. Let's just get this straight before I delve any more deeply into this story: I bake and cook a lot. Rarely do I burn things. Never (until today, at least) do I light things on fire. Capisce?

So this is how it goes. 

I was just piddling around in the kitchen, considering doing some dishes (I wisely decided against it) when I had the sudden urge to eat some toasted coconut. Weird, I know, but I've just stopped asking my taste buds questions by this point. So, remembering that I conveniently had some coconut on hand, I got to work. In case you were wondering, the very best toasted coconut involves butter, sugar, and cocoa. And coconut, but that's kind of a given. 

So I mixed up my tasty concoction (it was still tasty at that point) and put it in the oven. With the broiler on. At the time I thought, "Hey, I think the top rack is probably a little too close to the broiler. Maybe I should lower it so that it doesn't burn." But then the lazy part of me though, "Nah, I'll just set a timer and keep a close eye on it."

That little internal battle concluded, I closed the oven door and set the timer. After the allotted amount of time had passed, I checked on the coconut. It was not even the tiniest bit toasty. And, I'm sorry, but toasted coconut is far superior to nontoasted coconut. I'm not prejudiced, I swear; it's just a well known fact. So I decided to leave it in the oven a little longer. 

Then E called to me from her bedroom. I went back to her room to see what she needed and, in the process, completely forgot about the pan full of joy toasting in the oven. We chatted for a moment, but then I smelled something coming from the kitchen. 

"Oh!" I exclaimed. "I can smell the coconut, so it's probably burning." 

My fear was realized and surpassed, really, because when I opened the oven door, I was greeted by flames. I slammed the oven closed, unsure of what to do next. 

I then turned to B (who'd followed me to the kitchen from her and E's bedroom), hoping that she'd have some magical solution to my problem. 

She didn't. 

So, I did the thing that felt the most logical to me in that moment. There was a fire in the oven. Water puts out fires. So, I got a glass of water and dumped it onto the flames. 

They got bigger. 

This is the point when it would have made sense to  panic or freak out in some way. My reaction was quite the opposite, actually, as I remained very calm throughout the entire process, almost unconcerned that there was a fire in my oven. To be honest, I spent most of the time laughing. I'm not quite sure what this says about me, but it is what it is.

B and I looked for a fire extinguisher under the sink, only to come up empty handed. This is something we will probably have to change in the future. So, we just looked at each other, neither of us having any clue whatsoever as to what we should do. 

"I wish M were here," B lamented, naming a wise mutual friend of ours. "If anybody would know how to put a fire out, it'd be him." 

Light bulb. 

"Where's my phone?" I exclaimed. B and I have the same phone and the same phone case, so it took a moment of confusion to figure out which phone on the counter was mine. I located the phone that was actually mine, and called M up. 

I think the beginning of our conversation went something like this:

M: Hey. What's up?

Me: I lit our oven on fire, and I don't know how to put it out, and I figured that if somebody did, it would be you.

M: You lit your oven on fire?

Me: Well, not really. I mean it's localized to the pan in the oven. But there is sugar and butter involved and water just made it worse.

M: [momentary silence as he took in the odd situation and prayed that I would at some point in my life become a little less scatterbrained and less destructive]

Well, M didn't disappoint. Baking soda. He told me to throw baking soda on the fire. I gingerly opened the oven and tried to toss some baking soda on the fire. Unfortunately, the jagged hole in the box didn't lend itself well to aiming, and it ended up coating the bottom of oven, leaving the flames very much in tact. I closed the oven once more, pulled my hair into a bun (the flames were dangerously close to scorching my hair), poured baking soda into a bowl, and tried again. This time, I threw handfuls of baking soda on the flames and, wouldn't ya know, they were stifled immediately. Crises averted. 

Except for the thick cloud of smoke hovering in our kitchen and living room. 

B and I scurried over to a neighbor apartment and asked them if they had a fan. 

"What for?" A asked.

"Oh nothing...nothing at all," I replied. 

A cocked his head in the direction of our apartment and uttered the phrase that is now the title of this post. 

"Maybe," I told him. "It's possible." 

Unfortunately, they didn't have a fan. Fortunately, they knew an apartment that did. Unfortunately, we had never met them. 

But, B and I decided it was as good of an opportunity to meet new people as ever. At least we'd be memorable. 

So the cliff's notes version of the rest of the story is that we now have two borrowed fans at full speed in our kitchen and living room, and I'm writing this post with both front windows and the front door flung wide open. At 11:11 at night (make a wish!). With random people I don't know socializing right in front of the door. Awkward...

Silver linings to this experience: 

• I now have a greater appreciation for fire extinguishers and know what to do in the absence of one.
• I was able to laugh at myself during the entire experience and for some reason have no problem sharing the fact that I sorta lit my oven on fire with any soul who reads this blog (but in actuality, that's like 3 people, so it's not that big of a deal)
• I know where to find fans in this apartment complex should I ever need one.
• I made two new friends. Well. I met two new people. Whether or not they will want to be my friends after meeting me under such....unique circumstances is still up for debate. I'll keep you posted.