Thursday, November 14, 2013

things i learned today


  • If the instructions say to put something under the broiler for 3 minutes, I can only put it under our broiler for about 37 seconds. (Broiler: 2, Maddie: 0) At least nothing caught on fire this time..... 
  • "Bald face lies," "bold face lies," and "barefaced lies" are all interchangeable terms. The phrase refers to beardlessness/whiskerlessness. 
  • Polar bear flirting is....weird. Really, really weird.*
  • Putting the crockpot on the counter in clear sight is NOT a good enough reminder to turn it on before you leave. A neon sign may be helpful in this situation.
  • There is a phantom phone that lives in our couch. (I didn't technically learn this today, but I just thought I'd share.)
  • Watching Modern Family can sometimes help me with my homework. No joke. 
  • Putting the word "nutella" before any food item instantly makes it sound more appetizing.
  • One should never attempt to converse with a 16-year-old boy about dating. Just don't do it, guys.
  • Nobody should be this passionate about alpacas


*For the record, I had to write about a show called "Love in the Animal Kingdom" at work today. I don't spend my time researching the flirtation techniques employed by various members of the animal kingdom just for funsies. 

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