But as I've grown older, I've come to realize just how faulty and skewed my understanding of this concept was. You see, I equated Heavenly Father answering my prayers to me getting exactly what I wanted.
This is not always the case.
In fact, in my experience, it is hardly ever the case.
I naively and foolishly believed that if I really had faith, Heavenly Father would let me have my way every time. That's what "answering my prayers" meant, right? After all, why wouldn't he grant me a righteous desire if I prayed truly believing that He would listen and answer me? Why would He deny me something good if I had faith that He could make it happen?
But then I came to college and entered adulthood and experienced the things that you experience when you're too young to be cynical but not old enough to have the advantage of extensive life experiences. And all of a sudden some of the the things I wanted to stay in my life were disappearing and the things I wanted to be gone were unpacking their bags and settling in for a nice long stay.
And it was reality, regardless of how much faith I had or how hard I prayed that things would be different.
But then I came to college and entered adulthood and experienced the things that you experience when you're too young to be cynical but not old enough to have the advantage of extensive life experiences. And all of a sudden some of the the things I wanted to stay in my life were disappearing and the things I wanted to be gone were unpacking their bags and settling in for a nice long stay.
And it was reality, regardless of how much faith I had or how hard I prayed that things would be different.
But in spite of having so many things—good, righteous, wholesome, worthwhile things—denied me, I still believe 100 percent that Heavenly Father answers my prayers.
It's just that sometimes the answer is no.
And when the answer is no, it can be heartbreaking. It hurts, and it's confusing, and you're sometimes left asking why. Why would a loving God say no when you really believed in Him and when it's a worthwhile thing you're asking for?
I'll be the first to admit that it's tempting to get angry (or at least very frustrated) when the answer isn't what you were hoping for. Because you believed so sincerely. And you wanted that thing so very badly. But I also know that anger doesn't solve problems and that it will only make the answer harder to accept.
And at the end of the day, I know that Heavenly Father does things for a reason. Do I always know those reasons? No. In fact, I almost never do. Most of the time I just ask to be able to accept the fact that I don't understand.
But I know that I have a loving God. And I know he wouldn't say no when I ask for something good unless there were a reason. Unless I weren't ready, or I needed to learn something, or He had something better in store for me down the road. He knows what's best for me. He can see the end from the beginning when I can barely see three inches in front of me. He can see that some of the things I want that seem so perfect and so right are actually not what will bring me the most happiness in life.
I was never promised that God would answer all my prayers how I wanted and when I wanted. I was just promised they'd be answered. And they are.
But sometimes the answer is no.
And when the answer is no, it can be heartbreaking. It hurts, and it's confusing, and you're sometimes left asking why. Why would a loving God say no when you really believed in Him and when it's a worthwhile thing you're asking for?
I'll be the first to admit that it's tempting to get angry (or at least very frustrated) when the answer isn't what you were hoping for. Because you believed so sincerely. And you wanted that thing so very badly. But I also know that anger doesn't solve problems and that it will only make the answer harder to accept.
And at the end of the day, I know that Heavenly Father does things for a reason. Do I always know those reasons? No. In fact, I almost never do. Most of the time I just ask to be able to accept the fact that I don't understand.
But I know that I have a loving God. And I know he wouldn't say no when I ask for something good unless there were a reason. Unless I weren't ready, or I needed to learn something, or He had something better in store for me down the road. He knows what's best for me. He can see the end from the beginning when I can barely see three inches in front of me. He can see that some of the things I want that seem so perfect and so right are actually not what will bring me the most happiness in life.
I was never promised that God would answer all my prayers how I wanted and when I wanted. I was just promised they'd be answered. And they are.
But sometimes the answer is no.
No comments:
Post a Comment